It's a phrase I use often . . .
I'll start with grace. "Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; He rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him!" (Isaiah 30:18). There are two major areas of my life where I would be a complete failure if not for the Grace of God: Marriage and parenting . . . So pretty much everything at this point! This fall my husband and I have been married 22 years. By the grace of God, he still makes my heart go "pitter patter." By the grace of God, we don't scream and yell when we're mad or exasperated with each other. By the grace of God, we make it through the hardest of times. By the grace of God, we still find each other desirable even though our bodies bear no resemblance to the ones we wore two decades ago. By the grace of God, "for better or for worse" is do-able.
Frankly, I would not be married still to him without the grace of God and my faith in the One Who Is Perfectly Gracious. How anyone remains married without faith in God is beyond my comprehension. Realizing longevity in marriage takes work: putting self aside for someone else on a daily basis. But Jesus put Himself aside for me . . . he sacrificed everything to fight a battle over sin that He had no part in.
Is it all worth it? Our culture currently justifies serial marriage by implying that everyone deserves to find their "soul mate." Honestly, Jesus is the only one capable of loving my flawed soul that way. I may not have a "soul mate" in my husband, but I do have arms that I can recognize in the pitch-black darkness of night; I have a partner in life with whom few words are required to complete a task together; I have someone whose mood I can assess in 30 seconds of conversation; I have someone who may not make me feel pampered, but he makes me feel safe. There is no one I would rather have behind the wheel of my car in a snow storm. There is no one I would rather be next to in danger. There is no one I would rather entrust my children to when I'm not there. There is no one I would rather sleep next to every night. Is all this because my husband is so terrific, or because I am such a great wife? Absolutely and resoundingly NO! It's because God is gracious and longs to be gracious to us. Jesus said, "My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness" (2Cor. 12:9). You don't have to be married to your "soul mate" to achieve long and fulfilling marriage. You just need the incomprehensible grace of Jesus.
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More, more more! This is such a great viewpoint on the success of a marriage. I often forget the place of God in our relationship. It's difficult to be surrounded by the romantic notions of love that are portrayed in movies and TV. Please write more on this subject to remind us how to appreciate our spouses day to day!
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